Relationship-Building Tips for You and Your Surrogate
If you’re expecting a baby through the surrogate process, the months before you bring your baby home will be full of excitement and preparation. One important aspect of your preparation should be developing a reputation with the woman who will carry your expected child. This unique relationship will benefit you, the surrogate, and your expected child. Here are some things to consider as you build a relationship with your surrogate.
Why the Relationship Matters to You
The woman carrying your child has a unique connection to the baby, and your baby may someday want to know about her. At the beginning of the pregnancy, sit down with your surrogate and agree on a communication schedule. A two-way dialogue will help you and the surrogate to feel supported throughout the pregnancy. Being open with her about your dreams of the baby can help the surrogate feel reassured her baby will go to a loving home.
If the baby was conceived with the surrogate’s egg cell, she would give up her biological child. Ask her why she decided to become a surrogate and try to understand how she will feel when she gives you her baby. Show her how much you appreciate her willingness to participate in surrogacy with a thoughtful gift. If you choose to give her some beauty products, you should keep in mind that over 40% of women over 18 prefer natural beauty products to synthetic items.
How to Share in a Surrogate’s Experience
Going through a pregnancy is stressful for any woman, and a surrogate mom is no exception. One of your concerns will be her health since the surrogate’s health directly affects the baby’s health. According to Elevate Baby, one of the qualifications for becoming a surrogate is to have a BMI of less than 32. Maintaining good health through the pregnancy may be a challenge for your surrogate – just as it would be for any pregnant woman.
Your emotional support can be invaluable to the expectant surrogate throughout the months of her pregnancy. If the agreement you made with her allows it, you may elect to go with her to her doctor’s visits. This will show her you are willing to be her partner in health, and it will allow you to follow the baby’s development. If any complications arise, you can be informed during the visit, and you can be an emotional support for the surrogate.
Meeting Your Responsibilities
You can let your surrogate see your continued commitment to your coming child by fulfilling your legal and financial responsibilities. You’ll be responsible for the costs of the surrogacy process, which will vary. The cost of surrogacy will include the surrogate’s medical and hospital expenses, including the costs of any medical complications. If this is a gestational pregnancy, and it involves an egg donation, there will be an additional expense – just as there would be if the surrogate gives birth to twins.
You will also need to fulfill the legal responsibility of signing adoption papers. Even if the unborn child results as a result of your egg cell and your husband’s sperm, a surrogate is giving birth to the child, which makes her the child’s legal mother. The legal aspects of surrogacy are likely to be challenging for everyone involved. If you or the surrogate have any concerns you can’t resolve together, you should reach out to the professionals at the surrogacy agency.
Looking forward to having a child can have its challenges, but, in the end, you’ll have a new child and a new life to explore together. As you and the surrogate navigate this pregnancy, let the Golden Rule be your guide. By treating each other as you would want to be treated, you can help each other through the nine months of waiting. Best wishes to you and your surrogate as you travel this adventurous road together!
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Relationship-Building Tips for You and Your Surrogate